What the Bible says about Sympathetic Feelings

Matthew 6:11-15

The sequence of petitions in the second half of the Lord's Prayer tells us that we should pray daily for the food needed for that day. The next request is for God's forgiveness of our sins, followed by what can be a threatening, disturbing statement: that God's forgiveness of us is directly tied to our forgiveness of those who have sinned against us! We must reciprocate God's forgiveness by forgiving others' offenses committed against us.

Sin places us under obligation to seek forgiveness from God because our sins are against Him. However, a person cannot seek God for forgiveness until he is first aware of his indebtedness. One cannot truly forgive until he is aware of his shortcomings because it is from a sensitive awareness of one's own weaknesses that sympathetic feelings for others' weaknesses are born.

To impress this principle on every hearer of His Word, Jesus returns to the subject of forgiveness in Matthew 6:14-15 after completing His instruction on prayer. When such teaching follows so closely after identical teaching, God is clearly attempting to press its importance home to us.

Jesus' Parable of the Pharisee and the Tax Collector shows the self-righteous to be critical and unforgiving people because they cannot see their own weaknesses. They have a difficult time putting themselves into another person's shoes. Luke writes in Luke 18:9, 14:

Also He spoke this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others. . . . "I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other, for everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

How can a person forgive when he has an exalted opinion of himself and simultaneously despises others? How can one who in his own eyes never does anything wrong be guilty of committing an offense against another? This person is set up for being easily aggrieved over insignificant offenses that he perceives as having been deliberately committed against him and being unable to forgive because it is beneath him to excuse one he despises. To scorn the offender and to speak evil of him are far more likely reactions.

What is forgiveness on our part? It is to lay aside all claim of getting even. Paul writes in Romans 12:14, "Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse." He adds in verse 17, "Repay no one evil for evil," and in verse 19, "Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, 'Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,' says the Lord."

Rising to defend ourselves is a natural but carnal reaction, yet we must trust God to bring things to light in His own order and timeframe. We must not allow ourselves to resort to counter-offenses, as did brethren in Corinth, who took one another to court before unbelievers. Paul corrects them for not letting go of their vengeful spirit (I Corinthians 6:7).

Sometimes, we must be reminded of how important God considers our responsibility to forgive. Jesus' Parable of the Unforgiving Servant (Matthew 18:22-35) follows Peter's question in verse 21, "Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seven times?" Jesus' conclusion is found in verses 32-35:

Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, "You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?" And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him. So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.

This is truly a weighty responsibility. Only through significant prayer can all of our resentment be dissolved and any breach healed. God is the God of all peace. He can and will respond to our honest and sincere requests for the reconciliation of a damaged brotherly relationship.

John W. Ritenbaugh
Forgiveness and Reconciliation