What the Bible says about Hidden Anger
(From Forerunner Commentary)

Psalm 37:7-9 These admonitions can be broadly grouped into two categories. On one hand, we are instructed to let go of the anger, and on the other, we are told to wait on God. Both elements are vital—to be effective, they must be exercised together. In this psalm, David counsels us not to worry about people who rile us, advising, "Do not allow them to get your ire up." "Cease from anger, and forsake wrath," he writes. If a command like this is given, it is a sure sign that it can be accomplished—especially if we have been given God's Spirit. However, for the command to be carried out, it must be accompanied by the rest of the psalmist's advice, which centers on God's sovereignty and submitting to His control over us rather than continuing a power struggle that may have begun early in our lives. If we think we are—or should be—the one in control, we will likely be upset about what everyone else is doing and whether justice is being served as we think it should be. Nevertheless, David urges, put your mind at ease. God is on His throne. The evildoers will be taken care of, and the righteous will be rewarded—though it might take considerable patient endurance before it is all resolved. Yet, the fact that God is overseeing His physical and spiritual creation gives us the freedom to let go of the indignation, resentment, impatience, and antagonism that blossoms into anger, wrath, malice, and hatred. Verse 9 says that those who wait on the Lord will inherit the earth, indicating that they are also meek (see Matthew 5:5). This contemplation of eternity—an everlasting inheritance—is the flipside of those practicing the works of the flesh (including ungodly anger in its various forms), who "will not inherit the Kingdom of God" (Galatians 5:21). Unrighteous anger, no matter how well it is hidden away, will always destroy relationships. We should never forget that the essence of eternal life is our relationship with the Father and the Son (John 17:3). That relationship, though, does not exist in a vacuum; our relationships with others reflect the quality of our relationship with God (see I John 2:9; 3:15; 4:20). Those who meekly wait on God, rather than stoking the coals of anger within, will be given eternal life. David C. Grabbe Hidden Anger (Part Three) Related Topics: Accepting God's Sovereignty | Building a Relationship with God | God's Sovereignty | Hidden Anger | Waiting for God's Answer

Proverbs 26:24-26 Anger can be outwardly visible, but it can also show up in ways that are subtle, indirect, and deceptive. Proverbs 26:24-26 provides an example of this: He who hates, disguises it with his lips, and lays up deceit within himself; when he speaks kindly, do not believe him, for there are seven abominations in his heart; though his hatred is covered by deceit, his wickedness will be revealed before the assembly. Solomon describes a hateful individual, and in such a person, the related works of the flesh—contention, jealousy, selfish ambitions, and dissension—also probably exist. An "outburst of wrath" is also here, but not in the way that we would normally think. Everything this person does is his "outburst of wrath," except that it is more like a tamped-down volcanic eruption in slow motion. It oozes out rather than explodes. It does not possess visual or verbal intensity, nor is there obvious fury or violence. The anger, malice, and violence are hidden and smooth (see Proverbs 10:18). The anger can only be observed by its effect on others rather than in full-bore, red-faced fury resulting in bloodshed. The injuries from this individual are not physical; his aggression may be quite passive. Nevertheless, his anger still reaches out and attempts to destroy, though he may not even be aware of what is happening nor admit to being angry. Something similar is found in Proverbs 6:12-15 (The Amplified Bible): A worthless person, a wicked man, is he who goes about with a perverse (contrary, wayward) mouth. He winks with his eyes, he speaks by shuffling or tapping with his feet, he makes signs [to mislead and deceive] and teaches with his fingers. Willful and contrary in his heart, he devises trouble, vexation, and evil continually; he lets loose discord and sows it. Therefore upon him shall the crushing weight of calamity come suddenly; suddenly shall he be broken, and that without remedy. These people have something burning inside them, motivating them to the wickedness described in both proverbs. Something impels them to carry out their plans, regardless of the cost to others, and they may even rejoice at the price others must pay (Proverbs 17:5; 21:10). These are angry individuals, but their anger is hidden and finds its way out in subtle and creative ways. Proverbs 16:29-30 speaks of "a violent man [who] entices his neighbor, and leads him in a way that is not good. He winks his eye to devise perverse things; he purses his lips [as if in concealment] and brings about evil." David C. Grabbe Hidden Anger (Part Two) Related Topics: Anger, Hidden | Concealed Evil | Contention | Deceit | Deception | Flesh, Works of the | Hatred Concealed in the Heart | Hidden Anger | Jealousy | Passive Aggressive Behavior | Selfish Ambition | Works of the Flesh

Proverbs 26:24-26 Secular sociologists and psychologists have done extensive research and observation on most human behaviors, the various forms of anger being no exception. During World War II, military psychologists first used the term "passive-aggressive" to denote the behavior of soldiers who displayed passive resistance and reluctant compliance to orders. While "passive-aggressive" may sound like a person who switches between extremes—first passive, then aggressive—it actually describes one who is aggressive but in a passive, hidden, subtle way. According to these scientists' findings, such aggression—anger, wrath, malice, hatred—may manifest in "striking out" at others in ways that would not normally be considered violent. In their definition, passive aggression can include behaviors such as verbal ambiguity or mixed messages; avoiding responsibility; blaming others; chronic lateness and forgetfulness to avoid an obligation; complaining and general negativity; intentional inefficiency; avoiding verbal or emotional intimacy; not trusting others; manipulation and control of others; superficial submissiveness; back-handed compliments; fault-finding as a defense against getting too close; withholding information; showing displeasure by not conforming to expectations or standards; focusing discontentment on authority figures (employer, parent, teacher, even a spouse who has taken on the parental role); envy and resentment of peers who succeed or are viewed positively by authority figures; obstructing or sabotaging the plans of others; sullenness or sulking; and procrastination when assigned a task that is disliked. At the root of these behaviors is unresolved anger, frequently from childhood and adolescence. Researchers have found that individuals exhibiting passive-aggressive traits often began doing so due to a "power struggle" with a parent. When that primary relationship is dysfunctional, the child of a harsh or intractable parent finds other ways of "expressing" himself—ways to "even the score" without doing anything that really crosses the line. If these patterns of subtly exhibiting anger become ingrained, they carry through into adult relationships and occupations. They become the "normal" way of dealing with things that make the person uncomfortable or if "unreasonable" expectations are put upon him. Latent anger becomes the lens through which the individual sees the world, and passive-aggressive behavior becomes second nature. Thus Paul twice specifically counsels fathers "not [to] provoke your children to wrath" (Ephesians 6:4; Colossians 3:21). As we noted, wrath can be open and obvious or subtle and hidden, and it can acquire targets unrelated to the source. Anger, malice, hatred, and wrath are habits. They are learned and practiced. By the same token, they can be broken and replaced with appropriate and godly responses. Jesus Christ came to fulfill the prophecy in Isaiah 61:1, which includes "healing the brokenhearted" (see Luke 4:18). That healing, if we are willing, includes emotional wounds—"broken hearts"—as well as physical ailments. When we become aware of areas where our hearts are "broken"—areas where they have sustained injury or where we can see they do not work as God's heart does—it is appropriate to take this before God, acknowledge the brokenness, and ask for His healing. Sometimes the healing is instant, and other times it is a process that can take a long time. David C. Grabbe Hidden Anger (Part Three) Related Topics: Anger | Anger, Hidden | Complaining | Hidden Anger | Intentional Procrastination | Malice | Negative Attitude | Passive Aggressive Behavior | Procrastination | Provoking Children to Wrath | Wrath

Romans 12:17-19 The apostle Paul warns against anger and its cousins in nearly all of his epistles. But how he handles the topic requires extra consideration. For example, in Romans 12:17-19, he writes: Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, "Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," says the Lord. He had earlier commended the Romans because of their reputation for great faith (Romans 1:8). It does not seem plausible that these faithful Christians in Rome were tracking down their enemies, Dirty Harry-style, and exacting vigilante justice. The "evil," "wrath," and "vengeance" about which Paul warns do not have to be so dramatic. They could be as simple as repaying one little morsel of gossip with another little bit of hearsay. It could manifest itself in saying something perfectly true about someone else but is not appropriate or helpful to say because godly love covers a multitude of sins. But anger and its ilk can be manifested in little ways—in secret ways—in which no fury is observed, and maybe only a little damage is done, perhaps just enough to bring another down to size. The congregation at Ephesus he admonishes to put away "bitterness, wrath, anger, [quarreling], and evil speaking" (Ephesians 4:31). Similarly, in Colossians 3:8, he says to put off "anger, wrath, and malice." How were these attributes showing up? The Ephesians and Colossians were probably neither burning down their neighbors' stables nor poisoning their donkeys. Today, we do not hear of church members slashing the tires of other members' cars or of church services ending in fistfights. These manifestations, which we might think of when we hear of anger, wrath, and malice, would be crossing the line into the absurd for a converted church member. Yet, Paul makes a point to mention these same elements of anger seemingly wherever he went. Why? The simple fact is there are many manifestations of anger, many applications of malice, and many degrees of intensity and visibility of wrath. Regardless of the details, however, a person's ungodly anger can only destroy himself and others. If he does not deal with and remove it, it may escape in various guises to carry out its carnage (see Proverbs 29:22). Hidden anger can show up in purposeful unfaithfulness in commitments, leaving another person hanging. It may foster little bits of chaos in other people's environments. It might reveal itself in intentional procrastination for the sake of keeping others off balance or in doing a task poorly because the individual did not want to do it in the first place. It can manifest itself in refraining from doing good when it is in a person's power to do so. It may be disclosed by giving mixed messages for the sake of leaving other people confused or withholding necessary information as a way of "punishing" another and leaving him at a disadvantage. It might arise in secretly rejoicing at another's calamity or pouting when things go well for a rival. These things may seem minor initially, but consider what it would be like to live with a being with these attributes for eternity. When we consider that the heart is behind the anger, whether subtle or obvious, we can see why God says that those who practice such things—those who make a habit of anger and its cousins—will not fit in His Family. In contrast, Jesus says that His disciples are those who love one another. They look out for the well-being of others, even if it requires personal sacrifice. Such love does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not think evil, and does not rejoice in iniquity (see I Corinthians 13). David C. Grabbe Hidden Anger (Part Two) Related Topics: Anger | Anger, Ungodly | Bitterness | Hidden Anger | Intentional Procrastination | Love Covering Multitude of Sins | Malice | Passive Aggressive Behavior | Vengeance | Wrath

Galatians 5:19-21 Hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, dissensions, envy, and murder are all related to anger. In addition, anger need not be in the form of rage or fury. Some have quipped that "depression is merely anger without enthusiasm." It is still a problem even when it does not have visible intensity. The seriousness of these attributes is revealed at the end of verse 21, where Paul warns that "those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God." God considers these traits the opposite of eternal life in His Family. Consider how contrary anger and its cousins are to the fruit of the Spirit, found in verses 22-23: "love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control." Unrighteous anger will inhibit the expression of godly love. It will leech the joy out of life. Anger is certainly the antithesis of peace and longsuffering. It erodes kindness and is rarely in alignment with biblical goodness. Anger despises gentleness and resists attempts at self-control. In short, the fruit of the Spirit will not be found in a person while he is practicing the various forms of ungodly anger. Recall, however, that anger can be godly. It is an emotion created by God, and in the right circumstances, it is appropriate and even necessary. The Bible reveals God being angry and wrathful at times, and we can be sure His anger is always appropriate and in the right proportion. However, He is motivated by love, not anger, which is certainly not the case with man. What men like to think of as righteous indignation may not be anything more than a self-centered temper. A person in God's image, though, is one who is angry on the right grounds, in the right manner, at the right moment, for the right length of time, and with the right words and actions. That, we realize, is a very tall order! In "Anger: Spiritual Drano®" (Forerunner, December 1997), Dr. David Maas suggests that "the godly purpose of anger is to consume and destroy its target utterly. Nothing [is] to be left. . . . In every case in which godly wrath is exhibited, the target is sin, not people, although sometimes people get caught in it." Later, Dr. Maas writes, Psychologists have taken a long time to discover that anger does not dissipate until it has totally and utterly consumed its target. Some advise their patients to "let it all out," but Proverbs 29:11 says, "A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back." Venting anger only brings in more "oxygen" to make the fire burn hotter and more destructively. Again, the only use for anger is to destroy everything in its path, a scorched-earth policy. This emphasizes how important a correct target for anger is. However, anger that cannot reach and annihilate its target is turned inward, and as it was designed, it begins wreaking havoc. Physicians claim that anger turned inward can aggravate or cause digestive troubles, eye disorders, dental problems, skin diseases, hives, and ulcers. A person who cannot find a target for his anger becomes like a rattlesnake that, if restrained, will strike its fangs into itself, effectively committing suicide. Those with unresolved angers need to focus on the sins that keep the anger boiling. Notice the principle that anger will acquire a target—whether wrong or right—and the anger will not dissipate until that target has been destroyed. The safest target for our anger, then, is our own sin—something that can and should be destroyed. But what happens when anger is allowed to develop for the wrong reason? When it is directed against the wrong thing? When it is kept inside, held onto, nursed, and even secretly enjoyed? This anger eats away at a person, stealing his joy in life, limiting his potential, and keeping him miserable. It reaches out to injure anyone who makes a suitable target. What is especially alarming is that such anger can be hidden even to the person retaining it yet manifest itself in ways that are subtle, indirect, and illusive. David C. Grabbe Hidden Anger (Part One) Related Topics: Anger, Control of | Anger, Godly | Envy | Fruit of the Spirit | Hatred | Hidden Anger | Jealousies | Murder

Revelation 3:17 Christ rebukes His church of Laodicea because its perception of reality—particularly about themselves—bears no resemblance to His own. This spiritual blindness resembles the false expectations held by the people of Christ's time, with a notable exception: The members of His church have access to His Spirit—His mind, His heart, His perspective—and so should be free from much of the blindness that obstructs carnal man. They have the means to see more clearly. A more accurate lens is available to Christians, which is why He says, "[A]noint your eyes with eye salve, that you may see" (Revelation 3:18). Once God's Spirit has been given, the onus is on the individual to improve his own sight. Today's church member may demonstrate this blindness in ways similar to the blind of Christ's time. It may come in the form of an unshakable belief that he alone has the whole counsel of God or is the primary focus of God's attention. It may show itself in a steady stream of criticism of the brethren—criticism that encompasses all but the self. It may manifest itself in a self-centeredness that assumes the spiritual high ground, believing that the rest of the church needs to rise to its level. All of these distortions spring from not seeing the self clearly—a result of not seeing God clearly. The Bible gives two related principles regarding spiritual vision, particularly about being able to see God—and as we see God more clearly, our perception of all other spiritual matters will improve. First, Jesus tells us that the pure in heart—those without guile, pride, hypocrisy, envy, jealousy, competition, hidden anger, double-mindedness, or any other defilement of inward sin—will see God (Matthew 5:8). In the same vein, Hebrews 12:14 says that without holiness—God's consecration of us combined with our submission to His requirements for moral purity—one will not see God. Our spiritual vision will only be as good as our purity of mind and conduct. Any defilement will affect our spiritual sight, making it a never-ending challenge to see things as God sees them. It is far easier to compile and rehearse the failings of others than it is to overcome in areas where we fall short of God's holiness. Seeing through the lens of unquestioned, untested, or unreliable expectations—about God, about prophecy, about our standing before Him, or the like—leaves us little better than those who failed to recognize their Creator when He came to them. Yet, applying ourselves to this purifying process will begin to allow us to see things from a perspective that approaches God's own. David C. Grabbe Not-So-Great Expectations Related Topics: Church at Laodicea | Competition | Distorted Perception of Reality | Double Mindedness | Growing in Holiness | Hidden Anger | Holiness as Conduct | Holiness as Mindset | Jealousy | Not-So- Great Expectations | Perception of Reality | Self Examination | Self-Centeredness | Spiritual Blindness | Whole Counsel of God

 

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